A few thoughts

Our commitment to purity often revolves around constant decisions. Should I do this? Is it ok if we just talk? Are these jeans really a little tight? Is it ok if we hug?

All the questions, and the only answers are within our own determination to seek Christ wholeheartedly.

A lot of us, especially girls, somehow seem to lose our balance when a guy hugs us. Should we, should we not?
It’s just a hug. A friendly gesture… and on and on our conscience debates.

There is no right or wrong when it comes to physical (apart from sexual) interaction between the two sexes. However, a definite requirement in our Christian faith is to live a life pleasing to Christ. Our every action should first be approved by His consulting hand.

However, here are a few thoughts that could perhaps get you thinking:

If you had to ask a young, unmarried person whether hugging/embracing is part of sex, they’d tell you no.
But, if you had to ask an older, married person whether hugging/embracing is part of sex, they would most probably tell you yes.
Why? Because it’s part of the package. An embrace is an act of affection, that, in my eyes, cannot be seperated from any act of love.

How then, do we as young people give away part of our marriage package away so freely? Girls want to be loved, therefore we claim it as a friendly gesture. Guys most probably want to stay away from hugs, but allow it anyways as it allows them to be pressed against a girl’s body.

I’m not saying that hugs are wrong. What I’m saying is that we need to ask Christ if our hugs are pleasing and honourable to Him. If not, then stop.

Ask yourself too, if your hugging causes others to stumble, especially the guy. If you’re a guy, it could be the girl.
What is your motive for hugging someone?
What does hugging to do you? Does it let your emotions take a mountain high spin and your thoughts a wayward stroll?
Unfortunately, these are some of the naked truths of casual hugging. It is not pure. You allow yourself to be swept away and your heart is left unguarded.
And if you don’t feel any emotions when experiencing a hug, it’s possible that you’ve numbed yourself to the idea that there’s nothing wrong with it.

Like dating, the Scriptures make no mention of hugging being a sin. However, as I mentioned above, our every deed is accountable to God and we should test everything in His refining fire.

As for me, there will be no hugging guys. I know my weakness. Therefore, when I’m offered a hug from a guy, I proudly proclaim that I keep even my hugs for my future husband.
The more you save before you get married, the more you’ll be able to give and the more you’ll be able to receive.

Whoa, I love the thought of that! Thanks to the grace of Christ.


10 responses to “A few thoughts

  1. Right on Salome’! ;D I have never hugged a guy since making my commitment to purity (and only a little boy when I was young before that).

    I used to be in a teen choir, and a lot of the girls would go hugging all the guys (and in church as well). It’s just not right in my eyes. It gives the wrong impression. It looks like they “like” each other, that they are a couple, especially if they are constantly hanging out together! How are you supposed to tell the difference between “just friends” and dating each other unless you are one of their close friends?

    I won’t even shake hands with young men. I don’t want my mind to be just as pure as my my body, and even that little bit of touching can get a young lady into trouble. 😉 I prefer to be “better safe than sorry”. 🙂 It will not offend a godly young man to say “no thank you”, and if it does offend a young man, than he certainly is not the right kind of young man for you! 🙂

    Blessings and Hugs dear friend!

  2. Salome’, thanks for visiting Pearls and Diamonds and leaving a kind comment! I enjoyed looking around your blog…and this post certainly caught my attention, since purity is something I’ve spent much time stewing over. In fact, we’re planning a month focused on the topic in February! (Ooops…did I say that? It’s still a secret. 🙂 Anyway, if you have some favorite purity posts (of your own or others), we’d love for you to share them with us and we’ll consider sharing them with our readers!

    Blessings in Christ,

    Abigail @ Pearls and Diamonds

  3. Hey Salomé! Never been do your blog before, but just decided to check it out!

    If you have any articles ready for Priceless Purity, let us know!

    Love your blog, so excited to have some contributions from you on our site!

    God bless,
    ~Rachel & Jillian~

  4. Hey there, I am your super secret angel! You are such a wonderful girl and your commitment to purity will see you through. Shabbat Shalom!

  5. I used to struggle with this issue a lot too, only I came to a different conclusion than you. See, one piece of advice I was given some time ago was to guard my actions as if I was a married woman. In other words, check yourself by asking the question “would I be doing this if I were married, and my husband right next to me?” I use my own parents as an example; no one could doubt the deep love and faithfulness they have for each other! Yet they will frequently hug friends of the opposite gender when saying goodbyes and hellos.

    My family and I have been blessed with wonderful friends who are like family to us!, and that’s just how I love the boys of these families: as brothers. Nothing more, nothing less.

    Oh believe me, I don’t go around hugging just any guy! Only those who I know well and consider family. And by God’s grace, I’ve been able to keep my thoughts and actions pure. He is so good to me!

    Anyways, those are just my thoughts on the subject. 🙂 Thanks for sharing yours!

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